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my ignorance and selfish being.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008


people change!!


to my beloved parents,
would you stop assuming already?!
its really killing me!
what have i done that may have made you lost your trust in me?
i cried myself to sleep last night,-as you would know-, coz i accept the fact that you always accuse me for doing something that i didnt do.
last night wasn't the first time.
all i do is give in and act as if im at fault when the actual fact is that i just want you guys to shut up and stop nagging.
i think i've changed alot in this year.
i see myself as a whole different person.
i refrain from doing bad, most of the time, and tries to push myself forward to the good.
its obvious that you're not at home enough to realise that.
coming home tired is not an excuse to not entertain your kids at least for a bit.
now you know the reason why im hardly at home.

to my bytch,
do what is right and not what you will regret.
work things out. and when i say this, i mean talk, not text.
face to face and not through the phone.
and i know you will start tearing the moment you talk about that topic.
but let me just say there's nothing wrong with tearing.
feelings are meant to be expressed and not kept inside.

to my cousin[riya],
i'll be picking you up tomorrow. please tell mama that.

to some idiots,
you're really idiots.
i swear.

to afiq,
i know i have no say in this but,
try to talk to her about what you're keeping from her.
that is if you're keeping something.
try to convince her that there's nothing going on.
that is if there is really nothing going on.
try and make up for the times where you missed out in the littlest things in her life.
that is if you are gonna do it whole-heartedly.


i still miss him.
but the other interferes with my feelings.
incongruously, i step myself back to the dark, being a coward who'd never want to face the truth and runs away from it.

someone once told me not to always assume
coz assumption leads you nowhere but shame.

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9:09 PM